When I first heard ur silence I wanted it to be words of recrimination but it was the language of remorse. They kneel before every thing you've done but look me in the eyes for every word I speak. You claim they deprived you of innocence but my truth was heard with profanity. They turn a deaf ear to my cries but turn blind eye to your weepings and were left with the modesty of those who abused our infancy. They pray with their eyes open to comfort those who hunt .We took tragedy within our faults but they took vanity within the sacrifices we made to offer charity to comfort our absences of faith. I've trusted the hand of God but I fell into the abusive arms of your violation. I was fed the scraps beneath the table and I never more humane. My starvation was a gift and I watched them fed off your wealth. And I gave you my life and all you gave told me was I didn't even deserve death. But now that I've given mercy to those beneath you I've seen your impurities in their cleanest ways.
You reaped me of my amnesty and collected their weakness beneath the monastery. They bled to exchange their blood for an ounce of human nature. They lent solace in the times mercy became foreign and your tapestry was used to heal those you have abused. You wanted to taste purity but you drank from the water that held my sincerity and ate from the hands that never sheltered the fragile. I pray with my eyes closed but hear your voice within the walls that you called confinement but I called my church . they called my suffering a way of enlightenment but I called my disdain for them my nirvana. I've watched you in the dimmest of lights and the purest of vulnerability and all I've seen was the selflessness of a victim . We've stood in lines of harmless discipline but the cleanest of desperation. A way to sterilize the words that now fall silent.
I set the fire to the forest that was the isolation of my truth. Those who hunted no longer seeked shelter in my desperation. I no longer suffered alone now they felt the causality of my starvation .
As i never fed on those whose weakness was veiled by the futile ways of sovereignty. They craved the pureness of my flesh but never sought the innocence in my blood . Thy stood for me when they sought protection in my modesty but keeled once god's words spoke throughout my profanity. My nature was deemed an entity of insanity which they speak in their prayers. I sew them as they consoled in my tragedy but when given remorse it feeds their identities to a point of selfless vanity. They walk among the path of sincere as I've always knew who I truly was. God was no longer a man but a way to conceal the fallacy we live in . they bless my reality. as its dying they found faith in the same thing I've found my lack of amnesty. And my absences of Christianity never was the void of my conviction.