Its life

Dear, Man I once 

It has been 13 years, and I still remember the first time I saw you raise your hand to hit my mother. Do you hear me, I was only 5 years old. Seeing my own flesh and blood getting abused by a man that's never home. Bang as you continue to throw stuff at her. I don’t understand, I thought we were a happy family, but I guess I was wrong. Setting in the corner of the room trying not to listen to what’s going on. To small to fight and help my mom or maybe I was a coward, afraid that you would beat me the same way you did her. I left it alone, and hate grow within, my mind was dissociated to the point where I started taking it out in school, fighting, not doing work, and  throwing chairs at teacher, when they yell just because I was afraid that they were going to put there hands on me. But, thank you because of you I did 2nd grade again. Bang bang as you continue to hit my mother over and over again, next thing you know we find you bring other female into the house not knowing that we were next door looking through the peephole. You got caught up, cheating out of all things, cheating after you done put my mother throw so much stuff, cheating after she fought so hard to keep this family together. We all knew she hated you, but she stood right by your side no matter how many times you put your hands on her. Your mind was too narcissistic to care about us. Are family started to grow apart and I was happy. We got out when we can but my littles sister keep asking her father but who are you. I told her to pray because God is are real father and that man we once knew was a sperm donor. She was too young to understand what I was saying so she keep asking for you. She’s family so I do whatever I have to do to make her happy. I want you to look back in time, when I keep calling you trying to figure out a way for you to come and see her, and every time you had something else to do. Never made time for that one person that stills calls you daddy. Promising her that you would come and her out. I know the truth but could not break it to her. I'm not going to lie, because there is no reason to. At first it was tuft, we moved from place to place, to North Miami, to Hallandale, to Hollywood, to Fort Lauderdale, to Pompano Beach, to Key West and finley Boston, but it didn't matter because we were together and no one could separate us. Know it is too late for you to come back into this family because the only one that called you daddy now knows what a sperm donor it for, and every time she thinks of you, she’s happy that you gave your sperm to our mother because she loves her family just the way it is. I did not see it before, but because of you I see life a different way, I do not take things for granted, because I know how life can change at any moment from good to bad. It could even change depending on how you feel a day but when things are going well in life, you have to hold on to it as long as you can because that’s  going to help you do better in life. I also learned that home it not just a roof over you head, but it the people you decide to live with that makes it home. It doesn’t have to do family because as long you are happy where your live you can call it home. Listen, I do not trust you, but I do respect you because my mother always told me to respect my elders. So I hope your doing well despite the fact that your missing out on a lovely little girls life because me and Ashley forgot about you to the point where, we don’t care, because now your the stranger on the street trying to talk to us and you will never get that chance to see your little girl bloom like sunflower she will become without you, but at the same time you might not care because we stop reaching out and you never tried to get in touch. I'm saying goodbye this is the last you will hear from me. This Relationship is toxic and this would be best for all of us. You don’t have to worry about us and we don’t have to worry about you. I wish This didn’t have to be like this, but your actions lead to it.


Sincerely, Rebekah 


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