I've been in the dark for so long its hard for me to accept the light,

The truth is front of me yet I feel like everything's a lie,

So many scars and lashes,

So many burns I match ashes,

So many misses yet I still run to catch 'em,

Racing against time,

Its a dirty run,

I forgot how to stay calm and have some fun,

This pencil in my hand keeps my heart numb,

And this brain that keeps on pushing breaks physics down to crumbs,

I'm atomic,

We're all energy,

Yet Its so hard for me to see the friend cause I always spot my enemy,

Its just my perspective,

Paranoia, depression, anxiety,

The loneliness is cold and freezes me entirely,

I'm just insane,

I'm tempted to take my life away,

I can simply drive up the wrong way on the one way,

Man that sounds easy,

Super cheesy, super sleazy,

Choice to cheat on life forget the fucking peace treaties,

I see myself in flower beds,

Over how I tainted my soul painting my corneas in devil red,

I wish that god was real,

Can he release me from these malintentions that I feel?

Probably not thats why I choose to dress in ill and attempt to murder myself,

Inject me in my weakened heel,

I step forward like a soldier still entering the battle field,

No armor,

No boots,

No cloaks,

No spoofs,

No jokes,

I'm extremely serious, couldn't you tell the way I look, 

My eyes they're flaring furious,

Externally a man,

Internally split in half,

I'm psychotic cause I can't even relate to my own fam,

Doesn't anybody understand?

The distorted voices ranting about the government's plans,

How I always feel under watch by some police man,

I'm kept economically depressed even I can't control my American debt,

Yet I have to compete and dress,

Put on a show so these devils won't stick a spear under my chest,

But I'm feeling anxious,

Ready to die and shape shift,

Transform into a ghost and manifest into greatness.

I'm a great mess.