I Speak My Soul

Life once so innocent and pure. Allured by temptations the flesh was too weak to dismiss.

A kiss, so sweet.  So discreet.  Enveloped with all affections known to mankind.

But blind to consequences the heart was too foolish to deny.

A cry through muffled lips.  Why am I being punished for this?

Was falling in love at 16 equivalent to death?  Death of my soul?  Death to the virtues I no longer hold?

School.  Grades.  Goals.  Aspirations.  Desparation. 

Curled in a ball of emotions.  Pulled apart as if I were a feather in the ocean.

Pain.  Refrain.  Anger.  Shame.

I’m trying Mom & Dad.  But,

What about my inspiration?

Him.   He.  Breathes away the fog of my depression.

Refreshens.  His kisses like the ocean's to the dry sand of the beach.

My parents' approval will never be within reach.

And when I fall asleep, the tears that hit my pillow are stained black.

And when I try to remember the past I had with you Mom & Dad, it's painted black.

And when I yearn for you both to hold me as you did when I was a baby, I bleed black.

He holds the black of my heart and breaths into it, specks of gold.

Whispers strands of gold to intertwine and light.  To fight the ebony that was planted.

Uprooted and killed.  The gold triumphantly glows. 

The everlasting shine of a blooming rose, my heart has been painted red.

Because of Him.  Because he tell me..

"You can.  You will.  You are worth something."


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741