"I Ruined Myself."

I ruined myself.

Ruined doesn't really describe it.

Destroyed is a better word.

I destroyed myself.

I destroyed myself just so you could no longer ruin it.

I ruined the skin.

I destroyed it actually.

I tainted the skin with pink scars.

All over my wrists, and thighs and tummy.

Some so deep they nearly killed me.

I did this so you could no longer hurt me.

I ruined my personality,

I destroyed it actually.

I made myself become dark and sad.

I made myself into someone I'm not.

I did this so you could no longer hurt me.

It didn't work.

I ruined my image of happy.

I destroyed it actually.

I thought happy was dependent on you.

Turns out it's not.

All this for you and I'm still miserable.

I did this so you could no longer hurt me.

I ruined my mind.

I destroyed it actually.

I needed to believe what I was doing was right.

I destroyed everything I adored about myself.

Just because I thought I needed to be that way.

I did this so you could no longer hurt me.

But truth be told, I did all this because I thought it would make you love me.

And you don't hurt the people you love right?

 

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