I look at you

Location

I look at you. I see a dream.

A prayer, Spoken through dark dreams

we're so young to know what love is now

But others don't see our "why" and "how"

 

I look at you. I see a nightmare.

Skin stretched over bones in a nightgown

I make you your lunch but you cannot eat

You can barely even drink

without feeling pain in your abdomen

over the tumor, bruised skin stretches thin

on the lips that we share, you no longer grin

As you taught me to again and again

With no one else home until night falls

I watch you alone and my heart calls

to God for someone to alleviate worry and pain

My answer comes as quickly as rain.

 

I look at you. I see "Just a guy"

But you're the first to ask me how I am in life

I wonder why, I wonder why

You cared to ask me; so quiet and shy

I look at you and I smile 

pull down my sleeves and say "I'm fine."

 

I look at you. I see my friend.

You speak to me again and again

in this class where people shout and heads spin

you ask me how she's been..

 

I look at you. I see a shell.

Of a woman who has been through hell.

Your body is so small and frail

you swim in your dreams 

sometimes you yell

into the night, but I don't think you know

that we're asleep, But it's okay. 

I try to calm you anyways

Once the chemo took your mind

I tried to make my life look alright

to the friends I knew that pass me in hallways

but I'm suffering inside..

 

I look at you. I see hope.

you wrap your hand around my wrist 

and seal my lips with a tender kiss

for the first time in a year

I smile and it feels so real.

 

I look at you. I see you're shock.

That night he came to visit me.

on our fronch porch at 8:03

I though I should be embarrassed

but then I couldn't stare less

As he stood and took your hand

with a polite "I'm sorry ma'm"

It's one of your good days and you smile back 

I wish we could all stay like that.

 

I look at you. I see my love.

God's gift to me when life was so rough

you make me feel happy when no one else could.

when I come home i tell her that you're so good.

she barely murmurs, I barely heard her

"that's good.."

 

I look at you. I see your pieces.

My brother and sister

their newborn babes

My dad

and God's beautiful grace

linger around the hospice bed

I grab your hand and ask if I can have a moment alone

they leave then tears start to flow

I tell you the words he told me to say

you speak as if it'll take your breath away

"tell him that I love him too.."

and then as I put my bracelet on your wrist

soft words emerge from your lips

"you two take care of eachother.."

You remembered him. 

I let the pain escape finally

you blow a kiss and say

"be strong, baby"

 

I look at you. I see relief.

you don't mind taking all of my grief

The only one who knows how to hold me

and not say anything at all

No person can understand a pain this large

You hug me in the pouring rain

After I play her song by the ground she was layed in

my guitar brought the rain in on everyone's faces

but you hold me tight 

you become my rock

In a world that's changing

our love locks.

 

I look at you. I see my soulmate.

After all this time, It has to be fate

To have us pulled together 

and never pulled apart

to link together our young hearts

I wear your ring on my hand

And I know she stands

In Heaven watching over us

The only one in my family who approves of us

and That's okay

All I can say, Is she'll be there on our wedding day

She helped me find my one true love

Even when her body had enough

I can feel her smile shining down on us

and for you and I, That's just enough.

I look at you. It's just enough.

 

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