without embarrassment

it’s not a single word

and it’s not just a phrase

it’s the feeling I get

when I look in the mirror

too early in the morning

and I see the dark circles

under my eyes

and I can see how

the curves of my body

aren’t like other girls

bulky, gauche, unrefined

Is this what defines me?

unruly hair, crooked teeth
hundreds of books in my brain
bushy eyebrows, thin lips

the heart of an army of warriors

stretch marks, blemished face
a soul that transcends definition
 

                                                          when I was younger

I looked in the mirror

I knew I couldn’t ever be that girl

with long lively legs

brilliant bronze complexion

with only joy in her heart

the girl that my parents
wanted me to be

I never lived up to their dream

No, I am me. 

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