I Am.... Scholarship Slam // (Dear Self)


United States
37° 5' 24.864" N, 95° 42' 46.4076" W

Dear 14 Year Old Apryl,


When you enter these halls you can either rise or fall,

no you will move forward,

flow into the abyss,

all full of unknown faces,

where they only care about fashion,

who you are talking to tomorrow,

how messed up you got last night,

whose boyfriend you stole,

what country or state you traveled to,

how big your house is,

or if you can drive,

I mean what is there to face?

You are a hispanic-black girl but the color of your skin only proves one thing,

that you’re either ghetto, rude, speak in slang, or wear 200$ Jordans,

You aren't any of those things, you don’t own a pair nor are you from there,

You speak cautiously and pronounce it well,

don't get caught up in the social appropriation scale,

although, you’ve done nothing for the perception to stick

and you still wear what you did in middle school,

these people are your peers.

I wish you never listened to what they had to say because you already had enough,

enough on your mind, all you could think of was time,

the time to experience everything all in the blink of an eye,

your eye,

your hazel brown eyes,

all that they’ve seen and I wish you never stopped yourself from having fun, letting go, living a little,

which is why you're trying to catch up now.

You had your eye on someone when you came in,

you conquered your quest,

but it was a beautiful start and a unfair ending,

you lost some of your focus but not everything,

the friends you think are your friends now be cautious and watch your back,

you’ll have a rude awakening,

while you are here for your next 4 years,

find yourself,

but lose some of the old self,

don’t let it change who you are but grow,

you’ll need it soph-junior year,

that court hearing final decision you did that,

you will mesh with the flux,

coming from Big Hollow,

a prison sitting on a hill,

that chocolate fudge girl full of vanilla cone kids,

you thought you were the only one,

well welcome to this new pond,

find out what energy you feel resonates with yours,

then I promise you,

everything will make sense.

Cause even while you're still trying to figure things out,

your 17 year old self is trying to help you out,

because it doesn't get any easier so here is your guide.

Choose your path wisely and enjoy your traumatic ride.

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