i am becoming brave

by acknowledging my shortcomings;

the paths i was too scared to take.

i am becoming brave

by realizing the world is a big place

and knowing i will sometimes shake.

 

i am only as good as i am now

in the past i was weaker, i could barely take a blow.

but once you are touched by fire,

kissed by a desire to illuminate the world

and wave away the shadows and hordes of flies

you will find inside yourself a drive

that will make you flinch and pinch and grind your teeth

and bear your own world and all its grief.

to wake is to live, to die is to sleep-

let not the sheets hide your body underneath.

the world is more alive than any dream.

 

and when the violence touches you, all that lurks underneath

in alleys, around corners, in words unspoken and threats unseen

will make its debut on your own thinking screen

and drive you mad, and broken and bleeding in sync

with every victim of the same vicious machine.

but you must try to bring light to the deep

even if your own monsters tear at your seams

or the creatures in the dark have no eyes left to see. 

it’s the trying that matters, even the fruitless attempt 

to stop the freight train coming cold and dead in its tracks.

 

the sea of troubles is waiting to swallow us all in the end.

i am no longer able to close my eyes and pretend.

to throw myself at the sea, i must already be dead.

there is a certain honor before death, 

but after life departs not a shred is left.

a corpse loses its cause with its last living breath.

i must fight while i am dying, and in death may i rest.