A House is not a Home

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I was born into a world of destruction and hate, all led by you

You whispered nursery rhymes and lovely phrases into my ear with a hint of alcohol on your breath

You led me to believe in a world where you were perfect and understanding and capable of love

You introduced me to a woman I had never known and made me call her "mom" for the 6 months that your marriage lasted 

You forgot me at an unknown trap house

You forgot me at school

You just forgot me

You then left

 

You left and you never looked back

You never wrote

You never called

I lived my whole life without a father because of you

And I still wonder to this day if it was because I wasn't good enough for you

Because I wasn't pretty

       or smart

       or funny

 

But it's ridiculous to think like that

Because everyone deserves love

Everyone deserves a dad

but not everyone deserves

to be one

 

And maybe 20 years down the road

I will have a wedding

And you'll realize what a mistake you had made,

You'll wish you could take it all back,

and there I will stand, with no one by my arm

Walking down the aisle to the love of my life

Giving myself away 

Because I belong to no one. 

I will be happy,

I will be free. 

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