your kisses

on my neck, cheeks, forehead, and lips.

your arms

holding me

like that was the sole purpose of their creation.

your hands

and how they fit perfectly into mine.

your eyes

a brown that i'm not sure exist

anywhere else in this world

brown eyes that gaze upon me

like i'm the world's eighth wonder.

and then

the drifting away of our memories.

i don't know what love feels like

anymore.

vague occurrences of remembrance

of what used to be.

thoughts

of false realities

of what could be.

i'm struggling

to hold on to

the mirages

that show bits and pieces

of our dialogue

the smiles that lit my face as we conversed.

i'm racing

to convert these

into audio tapes

that can replay themselves in my head

infinite times.

i can't let you fade away.

but i can't remember 

what love feels like

anymore.

see, it's seldom i write love poems

but i couldn't think of a better medium

to suffice for the way you make me feel.

and it's ironic

i couldn't find a better way to explain

how at a lost for words i am

when i'm with you.

i mean there's no easy way to sum up you

the complex of complexities

the most perplexing of perplexing things.

it's ridiculous

i still find a way to think i can understand you

because in my heat i have to.

but i'm not quite sure what love feels like

anymore.

i'm not quite sure what you feel like

anymore.

you were my sun

but now the brightness has dissipated

and here come the cumulus clouds

and then the rain.

but i convinced myself that there'd be a small piece of you

in each raindrop that fell on me.

a piece of you

in each raindrop that accumulated

and soaked me.

a piece of you

in each raindrop

that weighed me down.

a piece of you

in everything that made me

forget

what love felt like

when you disappeared.

 i try not to dwell on my past

which seems now

to consist mainly of you

but it's become

something like impossible.

i over think.

i over analyze.

i try to rationalize

but it doesn't work.

i want to make this feeling complicated

and beautiful

and poetic

but i simply hurt.

i don't know what love feels like

anymore.

all i need to remember

is what you feel like.