My mind wanders to the night that still seems blurry,
“No one has to know,” he whispered
“but I don’t want to,” I thought
the words failed to escape my mouth
I was trapped in my own thoughts.
but a month later, they are taking my blood,
asking me questions I don’t have the answer to,
“Have you been sexually active?”
again, words fail to leave my mouth,
this time though
it is because I am unsure.
“it’s okay,” he whispered
I laid in silence,
my body stiff
why is this happening to me?
“we have to test you for HIV”
but this time
I don’t need words to express my panic
my eyes fill with tears
forcing me to relive the night
the night that I thought I could forget
wasn’t it “our secret”?