In Her Eyes

Location

The world crashes in front of her eyes


she doesnt know what to do


shes all alone , noone beside her


she tries to remember how it started, why it started


she starts from the begginng of her life


she was a accident made by a kid herself


love wasnt there


hidden deep down inside her


waiting to come out


but not soon enough


she wanted a boy, got a girl


thats when it started


the abuse mentally physically and emotionally


she was left at home alone


taking care of another little mistake


just able to walk, hating every moment in her life


everyone in it


wishes she could change it any chance she got


hated the little mistake she had to take care of


she needed help she neede to get out


go somewhere


finally


her wish came true


she got what she wanted


away


dropped off at the doorstep waiting for there new life to begin


she closes her eyes


not knowing what to expect


she dreams of a place where she can be the greatest little mistake ever made


she refuses to open her eyes


look into reality, see whats really on


shes stuck in her own little world


not caring


not loving


just hating


she doesnt know how to love


never taught how


never taught to give just take


she takes your heart and breaks it any chance she gets


it makes her feel happy


it makes her feel like the greatest mistake ever made


she tries to convince herself


this is the way to live 


but deep down inside she knows


that once was a dream is now a nightmear


her life


she wants to get out


make something of herself


she doesnt know how


doesnt know where to begin


she tried before but it was useless


she couldnt stay clean


she wanted to feel the way she did before


CAREFREE


the feeling of not caring is what she was good at


she could do it with or without  the help of her best freind


she missed the way it made her feel good or bad it didnt matter


she always came back for more


her life was in danger


nowhere to turn


she had lost control of her life


she says shes clean and got nothing to hide


shes out of our reach, left us behind


its a ll a lie


she lives right down the street


you can see it in her eyes


always worried


wondering whats going to happen next


scared


she sees a cop and tries to run


get away go somewhere


quick


doesnt want to get caught


go back to the life she once knew so long ago


just a faint memory


lurking behind the masked mistake


memory fading faster and faster


soon she wont rememebr the one she once called mom


shell forget the meaning of family


if she hasnt already


nothing left


no feeling


only her best freind


her life


 


by kristal rogers


this poem was writen about my older sister who fell hard into drugs at a very young age. i was 13 when i wrote this poem. the poem talks about my sister and my mom and me and our adoption.


 

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