Grief

The darkness of this night envelopes me in its cruel hands

I'm swallowed in darkness - sinking into a black put that deflects light or even beauty

My heart is dashed into pieces

each becoming lost and forgotten.

The life I once knew is disappearing in front of my reality 

There is no escape from this hell until time permits me to enter into its rest

I journey on

Even with little hope

and no faith 

I sing as I walk

My voice lights up the dark ally way

The desire for hope, a longing for faith rings as a chime 

through the thick, dark clouds of depression and grief

Denial, denial, denial

I lock myself in a cage every morning

And only am released in my dreams

Suck it up, move on 

Don't tell me how to feel

You don't know how dark my soul truly is

If you could see within me

even just a crack

You would run screaming 

So imagine how I feel

trapped within my same conscious mind 

day after day

second after second

thought after thought

I'm bathed in deception and hidden emotions

It's cradling me in it's arms and singing words of utter guile

Scattering my memories and buring them as a match in a hay stack

Consuming every last bit of any light I have left

Torturing me to believe that I'm nothing without you

That I'm just another face in this faceless world

Tell me I'm not though

I'm sending my plea out into the mystical void

Reassure me that I'm not going mad

and that my true happiness is not a far wait.

Because it's not ... right?

Don't change what I've already convinced my mind to believe

It was such a long path to where I am now

but my path seems blocked now

by my own locked up emotions 

that have raged long enough to 

break free

Now I'm a slave to the dark thoughts that I think

And maybe I will always be.

This poem is about: 
Me

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