Are you happy? I would ask you myself but the distance between us is greater than from here to the sun and back. You walk the halls of this house like a ghost, like a ghoul, appearing in and out of rooms at will, only to cause mayhem, only to disappear once more when you're satisfied with your night's work. Can I ask you dad, are you happy? Are you happy now that you have torn me from my home? Are you happy when you scream at my sister? When you make mom cry? Did you have a smirk hidden on your face when grandma died? When you told us all we would become more of a family, yet you left us outside? Does it please you to belittle us, to remind mom that her work is lesser, that I am no more than a wimp, that my sister is a failure, that we all do not live up to your perfect expectations? Are you pleased when you have the chance to make my sister flinch at the sound of your voice, to make even the pets cower when you enter the room? I ask you this, do you expect me to respect you, when all you have ever given me is false hope, whispered lies, and tearful eyes? What is your goal, my dear dear dad? What is the point of this long winded ruse? Is it control? Dominance? A desire to lord over us, to have power and respect? I want to know dad... why you chose to leave us, why you weren't there when I was growing up, why you gave up on us. You were there and then suddenly you weren't. You abandoned us, abandoned your family. You say your sad you aren't in the pictures, you act distressed when we do things without you, sometimes you even pretend to play the role of father..yet at the end of the day you return to your cavern and you hide. You disappear into the darkness into the abyss, only to rise up when angry, like a big giant black bear, roaring to assert his dominance and insight terror on everyone else. I ask you dad.... are you happy? Does it please you to know I only have one parent and her name is mom? Would it bring joy to your eyes if I informed you that you did nothing to shape me, nothing to raise me? Would you be happy to hear that I gave up on you years ago, that you are nothing more than a stranger hiding in my home? Would your lips raise into a smile if I said that I was happy to leave you at the end of this year? I say this dad, in order to say goodbye. I hope you're happy, I really do. Because out there, once, was a little girl, and she believed in you. But she grew and she grew and she learned. She discovered you were just like Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and the Boogey Man all combined, and she did not believe ever again.
So I ask you dad, Are you happy? I really hope you are.
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