"Fourteen"
Location
“Fourteen” by Alliyah Fabijan
I am
14 14 14
14 14 14
14 14 14 14 14
14 14
14 14
14 14 .
It is too late to turn back,
take the pain. Wash it away with a dream of ominous black.
Will I ever see the light? Falling deeper.
Father, do you forgive me? A silent sinner.
“Trust me”, he said. “No”, I said. Arms clenched tight.
My body too restricted, I lay in anguish of my plight.
Still in my bed, alone at last. This is my room, I can see
but as I turn to my mirror… Why can’t I see me?
Awaken I have, may light of day heal me. Abandoned.
Torn flesh between my legs, I do not weep
I pray unto thee. Give me strength for I have sinned. Only silence and not a peep.
Naked I lay. May the shadows of shames
course through my veins.
Human no more, a stone shall I be.
Desperately I plead, search for someone to help me
A listener they may stay, even more alone. I am a mess.
Still a young girl, no more no less.
Lucifer’s burns still scar the apples of my cheeks.
Juxtapositions of the life I could have led.
A statistic is the short story I have lived.
Even in a poem, I can’t express the suffering I have felt.
Why couldn’t you have been given the card I was dealt?
Today is no different; however, I am seventeen
Now, in relationship that has no trust. He feels it isn’t his place to intervene.
Do you hear me now?
No, sympathy will only be loaned somehow.
A wasted corps, I will continue to fray
Because three years ago he took it all away.
Father is still angry. A sinner I will remain forever,
I have hit rock bottom, despite my endeavor.
I was only
14 14 14
14 14 14
14 14 14 14 14
14 14
14 14
14 14 .