For almost a moment, my head careens
my heart flutters,
my legs lean.
But I open my eyes: it was only a dream.
Not even a dream; perhaps a wish
a touch in the dark,
a lipless kiss.
For a moment my hands caress a hope
of having the love of sweet loneliness
instead of the hatred of company.
How many years will it take to find?
Perhaps it is not something to keep
but is only found here,
Between the sheets of waking
And how was I to know
that the only way to love
is to learn loneliness by heart and soul?