I’ve never felt so frustrated before in my life.

I feel like I’m suffocating.

I just want to scream.

I just want the whole world to know…

...but that would be the end of me.

I feel like my innocence has been stolen.

I haven’t smiled since that fateful day.

Forgive and forget is easier to say then do…

...it's not easy to forget.

If others knew, I can only imagine what they would say.

 

People say during tough times, you can survive when you surrounded by the one you love.

 

I’ve told the ones that I love to be strong. To fight back. To be the best and not let anyone tell them they can’t. I’ve always been viewed as a strong one. As one who won’t let anyone tell me what I can and cannot do.

 

But what if in the end I wasn’t strong enough? What would people say? What would she think of me? I’ve always told her the most important thing in any relationship is fidelity, honesty and respect. And I feel like all of that has been stolen from me.

 

I can’t utter a word

Never

And they both walk around like everything’s okay. It’s not!!!!

 

They walk around with deceiving smiles, torturous laughs and voices enough to beg life to be gone.

And the saddest part is that I trusted.

I trusted… trusted…. Trusted.

 

I choose to pull them close. In the end, I only ended up hurting myself. I thought friendship was strong, but I guess it can only be so strong.

I was willing to get into trouble. Willing enough to lie to the ones who TRUST ME. and guess what? The only thing you get back is

Aww, I’m sorry.

Like it was all a joke to them. Because they got what they wanted.

 

 

And now I’m disposable.

 

Disposable.

 

And it hurts.

 

--BinaLaDivina