Discovering Self Worth

Location

South Africa

Some days drug on

Slower than a snail scraping across a plate of salt

A symphony of nails on a chalkboard  

Serenading my every move

Reminding me

 

I quickly learned how to cleanse

The wounds left by biting remarks

With my own soothing inner monologue

 

“You are better than that

You deserve to be happy

You have worked hard for everything you have

Do not let them make you see yourself as

Less

You are

Enough”

 

Suiting up in armor of sarcastic remarks

And jaded smiles became a

Daily routine

 

It didn’t take too long for me to

Make some enemies

And lose some friends

 

Feeling like an outcast didn’t stop me from

Leaving my mark on a place that

Didn’t want me to begin with

 

 Other days, however, flew swiftly

Carrying me through on a current of melodic laughter

Carving canyons of light in my days

With each heartfelt tinkle

 

I used my armor to protect me

As I found ways to go places

Many had never even

Considered

 

The fact that I was unwanted made it

Immensely easy for me to work my way

Out of there in the coming year

 

My days became embellished with

Fancy words like

“School Based Scholar” and “Co-Op”

But really,

I was out

 

College, Which I had been

Begging/praying/yearning for

Became my escape from the mundanity

And isolation that had become

My daily life

 

Work became my safe place

My home away from home

Where I could show my strengths

And work on my weaknesses

Without being ridiculed for either

 

I did, and continue to, encounter the unfamiliar

And I tackled it with guns a blazing

And with an open mind

 

This is the year I truly discovered

What I was made of

The year that I discovered

I am who I am because of what I’ve done and

That

Is okay

 

 

This poem is about: 
Me
My community

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