Damaged Goods
You enter a farmer’s market
There is a wide range of fruits
From oranges apples pomegranates and yes
Even the controversial tomato
Some are more bruised than others
Some are bigger, brighter, more bitter than others
Some are sweeter, softer, more sour than others
You only have around a dollar in your pocket
So you go to the fruits that are on sale
All of them in some way are damaged
That is why they are on sale
You grab me at first
An orange, hard to peel, but rich in vitamin C
However you’re unsure because you see her, an apple
Sweet with no peeling needed
And you didn't have a cold so you didn't really need the vitamin C
You could strip her down with one bite
While I took time
So you put me down
Or more like
dropped me on the ground
Bruising me even more
You Pick her up
Pay the woman with the thick accent
Who tells you
“That orange wasn’t ripe anyway”
And I watch you walk away with her
Hold her
Delicately
The way you never held me
But rather than feel myself rot
I feel myself beginning to ripen
Because
If you had only waited just a little while longer
Taken a little more time to peel off my layers
You would've seen I was the sweetest thing on the market
Grown without GMOs
While she was manufactured to be identical to the apple right next to her
I am ripening
Not rotting
As you pick up up someone bigger, brighter, but never as sweet as me
And I wish it ended there
With you leaving and me existing
Stronger
Riper
But of course it’s never that easy
And I wish I could say that I didn’t stay there
Hoping but at the same time not hoping
One day
You would realize your mistake and come back to me
And one day you did
And while I was stronger than before
Ripe as ever before
You still didn’t want all of me
You negotiated with the lady with the thick accent once again
And
It was agreed
That you would peel me
But you’d only take my skin
Only willing to eat the outside
Not bothering with the inside
Because that apple you took
Her
You still had her
And you only wanted what was inside her
Everyone else
you said
“Was just skin”
I never thought it was possible for an orange to bitter
Only Sour
But I get this taste in my mouth when I see you with her
It’s tangy and envious
And so here I lie naked bruised battered exposed to the world
With tears of citrus running down my cheeks
Making those cuts on my heart sting
I wish I could say you didn't leave me weak
That the birds didn't come attack me while I was weak
Or that whenever I see you walk by biting that apple
I don’t rot just a little
that
I don't want to unravel myself into ten parts and fling each peeling at you
The first one love
I still love you damn it
Because you were the first person I let under my skin
The second one lust
If this is what you wanted I would have given it
The third one hate
I hate you
I Hate you
I Hate you so much
I hate you more than Donald Trump
The fourth one tears
I’m done crying
The fifth one Disney movies
I am Belle goddamn it and you are just Gaston
Gluttonous Greedy and Guilty
I am a princess and you were just a frog not yet, not ever, a man
Go ahead. Try to be snow white. Eat that apple that poisoned you once before
And expect it not to do it again
The sixth one late breakfasts after morning runs
I still run faster than you
I’m just no longer waiting for you to catch up
The seventh one: pool in your garage
I guess I struck the eight ball in because our game ended early
The eighth one goodmorning messages
I’m now messaging you goodbye
The ninth one arguments on your front porch
I don't even remember what they were about
And the tenth one: peace
The one that I do not yet hold
It's been five months since you left
I used to think it was my fault
Maybe I just wasn't in season
Maybe I was between fall and winter
That that’s why you got with her the same day you left me
Maybe I was just a passing of seasons
And she was winter
And I was just the last leaf that fell of the trees
But
It's been five months since you left me
And it's been five days since you left her
And now I see you passing by with someone new
a peach
And I realize now
It wasn't me
It wasn't her
It was you
And your constant changing taste
And in the end
You'll only end up bitter