How can I manifest heath when all I can think about is death. Feeling so sad and shut off what's up with the lingering cough. Stuck in my ways fir the last umpteenth days. Did it without a care in the world I woke up when I stopped acting out will no one hear my shout I've let it out time and time again. There is a dependency that emanates from my soul take care of me it says. People judging me on past indescretions. All if a sudden it all matters. I feel the loneliness the lack of money. The disconnect the lack of community. It was a non issue before . The thing was I had no idea what was in store . As I look at my younger self I'd say the future is comming you need a foundation. Or you will be sad more than you feel glad hope will be an illusion an intrusion of sorts . Tomorow is not promised dude things are not so funny . Is it ? Tick tock tick tock tick tock . Hey my poems on the page people gotta see I need it to be all about me. Maybe I've had it all wrong this whole time wasted my prime dreaming fantasy of success. Not facing reality to my behest. Tick tock tick tock tick tock Well today I get to say. All the fear and doubt I am finally hearing my soul shout . I take one action today moving in the direction of my play. I still hear the clock tick and tock the only difference is today I've come out from under the rock.