Slowly it creeps behind me.

Ugly and unwanted!, it shouts at me.

It doesn’t care if it hurts my feelings.

Can or will it ever stop?

I decide that I will take matters into my own hands.


Eluding my loved ones, I seek comfort at the bottom of a pill bottle.

Awake I lay on my bed, calmly waiting for the sweet release I so want and need.


All at once, it’s here. What I think I want.

Remembering. Everything. My 6th birthday party. My first kiss. Failing my Trigonometry test.

Everything slows down.

Now I see what’s important.

Everyone I love. My parents. My siblings. My family. My friends. My boyfriend. My dogs.

Stop, wait! I changed my mind.

Slowly, the room gets blurrier and darker.

& now I can no longer see.

People walk in. I can only hear muffled words.

Rushed to the hospital, I feel the shock of the defibrillator.

Everything hurts.

Value is the clarity I was given.

Everything has value. My life, his life, her life, their lives, and especially yours.

No one is alone.

There are people out there. They value your life as much as their own.

It’s never too late to seek help.

One call can change everything, 800-273-TALK or 800-442-4673

Never believe you're alone.

This poem is about: 
My family


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