Scrolling through my photo stream
all the pictures of myself
they aren’t what they seem
Filters left and right
Black and white and bright
All these faces unrecognizable in the harsh bathroom light
There’s no selfie in the world to capture my essence
and since there isn’t,
Why do I try?
I look at the mirror and back at my phone and wonder which one lies
In one I see myself, every imperfection there
from the bumps on my skin to tufts of unruly black hair.
I also see my lips curled over a gap so wide
thank my genetics, from which I can’t hide
I see my true self,
poetry in motion
a beautiful sight to see
In the other, I snap the picture and review it
like, this can’t possibly be me
My skin is clear
and I’ve found my angles
but where is my soul
and where are my tangles
where did my chipped tooth go?
Its right here in the mirror
And how does my chubby face appear thinner?
The mirror is for my eyes only.
I see me when I see me.
I smile at her, she grins back with reciprocity
The camera, on the other hand,
Takes my image and manipulates it til it’s instagram-worthy
The girl in those pictures may not be familiar,
but aint she purdy?
Aint no shame in this filter game, baby, please believe me.
But when you see my new avi on twitter, just know you’re not seeing me.
My truth is in my words,
and even those can mislead you
I can’t compress my thoughts into 140 characters
that’s not enough time to teach you.
Yet they say a picture’s worth a thousand words
that was a half-lie
A thousand words couldn’t do me justice either,
I know because I tried.
I can’t tell you about my cocky little stroll,
it’s indescribably unique
and I can’t tell you about my passions
without stomping my feet
I can’t tell you where I’m from without taking you there
I can’t invite you into my world without giving you a whiff of my hair
It’s all deceiving, I admit.
Especially my pictures
You see what I want you to see
So I add a few filters
You don’t know who I am,
I can’t capture that on a camera
The only thing you need to know, I’ll go ahead and tell ya
My name is spelled M-a-k-i-a-h
And it is pronounced Muh-Kai-yuh
my soul is not photogenic
and cameras are liars