Hello, sir! How do you take it? Cream, sugar, both, black?

Actually, none, thanks. Take it back.

If I wanted a cup, I'd call you up.

But I don't need a single drop. So, you can stop.

These caffeine fiends surround me, saying, "It's not a drug if it comes in a mug,

and it isn't peddled on the street by some thug, so what's the harm? 

Here, you look tired! I made a fresh pot!" No, I'd rather not. 

"HAVE A CUP, HAVE A CUP, HAVE A CUP, DRINK UP!

"COFFEE, COFFEE, COFFEE!" Lay off me!

I'll take a good night's sleep over a hyperactive bladder.

Now, tell me sir, how will you take it:

The former, or the latter?