Breakfast is All I Can Make (September 21, 2014 5:10 PM)

I was sitting in my room

doing a couple of things I shouldn't
by ignoring the few things I should
shouldn't be reading lyric analysis 
because I should be filling out my college applications and studying for my Gov test
shouldn't be starving myself because, well, that's bad
breakfast is all I can make
it's kind of sad
I felt like I was going to pass out
so I rushed to kitchen
to make breakfast in aggression
I was cooking breakfast around 4:36
& then I found out dinner was in the fridge
but it doesn't matter 
I'm going to need dinner
15 minutes later
because my metabolism makes the satisfaction fade faster
"oh my God you're so skinny it's not fair!"
but you don't understand it's how I was born coupled with the fact that I don't take good care
of myself:
of my skin
of my insides
of my hair
& I wonder if it's because of my complex
being told I'm so skinny, I've got clear skin & nice hair because it's all a contest
how often is a compliment a compliment
& not covert self-defacing
how often do they look in the mirror & see what I see?
they all think I've got it all
but I can't stand to feel stupid
I don't try to fix it
I wallow in hatred
& scour at my ignorance
I don't know how to my laundry or my hair
that's what's not fair
but I know it's my fault
but I told you I can't stand to feel stupid
so I put my progression to a halt
I've got straight A's but I can't whip up much more than eggs
lunch is confusing
dinner is unfathomable
breakfast is all I can make


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