Blackout (travelling at night in an area familiar in daylight)

 

James 1:17 17 All generous giving and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights,

with whom there is no variation or the slightest hint of change.

 

Why the darkness at times? … For our better understanding?

 

Here I go full of confidence … a little uncertain however

Pretty sure of where I’m going … but will I ever get there

Darkness my circumference … not thinking I would ever

Lose my memory and its flow to see blackness everywhere

 

Panic of flesh then besets me as security seems all gone

Faith for a moment left me depending on my flesh alone

Realization now begets me, that the memory of God’s Son

He can give or take at any time … before the day is done

 

I suddenly start to realize … all can be taken fast away

Even my love to sympathize … may not be here to stay?

The ability to know and memorize our dues to pay

May leave as soon as we criticize … neighbors along the way

 

Memory and remembering are not personal possessions

Although it seems to be our own, it’s not ours to demand

It can be easily taken away in an unexpected intersession

As we pray in our own will with our flesh too close at hand

 

We ignore the probability … that our mind is not our own

Living on borrowed time … seems of little recognition

All of us seem the same … as though we all are cloned

Not even realizing the possibility … of deep inner-derision

 

And so we muddle on in the self-made pond of mire

Thinking of purpose and call with ears that cannot hear

Hoping that others not notice the darkness of our desires

About a paradise where only we rule … like we love it here

 

Empty barrels are as noisy as the addiction to our-selves

We seem to reason and dream about fortune and fame

Then we would make a difference with a bible on a shelf

Although seldom opened … we depend here on God’s name

 

Surely even our senses here … are not to keep us clueless

Although even in that … I don’t seem to understand the call

Eyes to see, ears to hear and perception of the spiritual mess

that formed in our religiousness … that we created after all

 

It seems so with memory or the little intelligence used

It is here for us for a while till we have to pay are dues

Sub-consciousness another … luckily beyond own abuse

As time and time again we show, that we have no clues

 

Maybe the great difference … between good, evil and addiction

Is not to be understood … but to experience through pain

Barely comprehended … but to be accepted in affliction

As surely we don’t seem to see beyond love of personal gain

 

Jan Wienen