So here I am

Sitting on the same pink carpeted floor since age 6

It’s gotten much dirtier and more grody since then

And fitting enough, I feel the same

Tonight was a horror night

I think of less dramatic wording but there doesn’t seem to be any

As to me it doesn’t get much worse than the now

And the most painful part

Doesn’t seem to be the stomach cramps

Or the overwhelming feeling of nausea

Not even the bruises from kneeling over the toilet for so long

It’s knowing I have lost control