Perhaps this is not truly how love is.
Perhaps, in some distant universe,
Love is a more gentle thing.
There, I would not have to promise you everything.
There, I would be free to love myself
Even if I was unworthy of it in my eyes.
Maybe I could love others there.
Maybe I could discover something platonic
And keep a friend without losing you.
Is it conceivable for us to spend time apart?
Is it conceivable for you to not own my heart,
For us to fight and make up?
Is it possible for such a place to exist?
Is it possible for me to hate the things you do?
Could I hate being your loving slave?
Perhaps that place is here.
Perhaps you don’t have to hold me away
From the glory I’ve always dreamed of.
Here, I might not fall for that sly little smile.
Here, I might not long for your embrace
No matter how strong and safe it is.
Maybe you can continue to love me.
Maybe you can kiss every new wrinkle
And every other sign of ageing I show.
Is it possible to live without you?
Is it possible to hate you
For what you have done to my soul?
In this mysterious world,
I say it is all perfectly fine
Because you love me.
Perhaps that is not true at all.
Perhaps your tricks are just that,
A ruse to gain my affections.
Unaware of this, I could be.
Unaware of the unvarnished truth,
I could be in a rabbit snare.
Maybe I do deserve more than this.
Maybe I do long to be in the world
With you acting as my loving support.
Is it possible that you are the true poison?
Is it possible that I am suffocating
Choking on your four words?