Because I'm Obedient

No one knows what I've been hiding,

And if I tell they'll think I'm lying.
He's a Pastor,
And she's his wife,
Together they live the "perfect life."
Or so you think til I confess,
The little secret that I possess.
I'm her child,
So she's my mom.
She doesn't accept
Where I choose to belong.
It started when I was just so tall,
And I wanted nothing more
Than to play with the ball.
I kid I kid:
I gave her head,
While watching cartoons,
laying in the bed.
From that day on
I changed my demeanor
To fit where she wanted:
Yeh, I couldn't beat her.
I fooled everyone,
And No one could tell,
But I knew my life would be a living hell.
I still don't know what I'm supposed to do,
And I pray to God, he'll give me a clue.
I don't act myself:
Which is as GAY as can be.
I'm loud and obnoxious,
That just ain't me!
And if I could change I would be ANYTHING.
I act mean, and I'm hyper.
But you can say I'm really a 'shy showstopper'
cause I've broken my heart,
Trying to be what I'm not.
They think they know me,
But I promise they don't.
Not yet of course,
I must, o I must
pull the curtain first.
I claim I'm so real,
But I can't even tell,
I know for a fact that she's going to yell.
"Just tell them" I say,
only talking alone
To me and myself
Because 'I' is gone.
She'll disown and reject everything I've become,
Most likely won't talk in a calm soothing tone.
I'll then speak up and hope to survive,
The sad ass truth that'll then become lies.


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