Awaiting Admission

Will they like me?

Will they bring me into their circle?

Will they find me worthy of taking another look?

Or,

Am I not enough for them?

Have I not done my part,

Not done all that they have asked from me?

I’ve worked for them.

Sweat for them.

Cried for them.

Lost sleep for them.

Knowing a decision is out of my hands irks me.

Unable to speak for myself

Or sway their minds

Or give my two sense.

No way to make their choice for them.
 

Out of my hands and unto theirs.

This waiting is what kills me the most.

Imagine, I never get word on my endeavors

No one ever acknowledges I even tried

That I dedicated myself to the process.

But

Maybe

Just, “putting the effort”

Simply isn’t enough.

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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