Automaton

I was never used to choose. 

Standing at the intersection, I looked at the two paths before me. 

Usually, the choice was simple. I just had to follow the way that felt the most responsible.

The way everyone would want me to follow. 

The wise way, the smart way, the adult way.

This time was different. They let me choose and that scared me to death. 

For days now I had calculated each option, trying to figure out which one would make everyone proud.

Both choices tortured me day and night and I was incapable to decide. 

"Daughter, what does your heart tell you?" 

I stared at them, confused. 

"My heart?" 

I had given up on following my heart a long time ago. 

When I had realized how much they expected from me.

"Be a nice, responsible girl. Straight A's. Always. Take care of your siblings. Do not talk about your feelings. 

Be strong! Don't cry. Don't love too much. Don't hurt. Keep your heart silent."

And now they asked me to listen to a tamed heart that had forgotten how to beat.

"What do you want?" 

I turned to them like an automaton. 

"Adults. What do you want?"

 

This poem is about: 
Me
My family
My community
Our world

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