i sat,

on the edge of dexterity and ineptness.

my heartbeat couldn't decide whether it wanted beat into an oblivion

or just stop all together.

my mind was split in two.

i wished to be yin and yang

yet, i could only achieve one.

i wanted to be the bad inside the good

yet, the good inside the bad.

i desired to be the essence of life itself.

i want to be a blazing candle in an abyss

yet, the shadowy oasis in the desert.

i came to the revelation that i was neither

good nor bad,

sick nor health,

light nor dark,

i longed to be voluminous,

capable of swallowing this earth whole,

being the ocean suited to end this world

or let it thrive.

but the physical antonym within my being suggested

i was nothing more than a puddle of muck and acid rain.

yet, i was hungry for power and full of persistency

and thats what frightened me the most.

determination and domination grasped me by the harness

and lead me to heaven or hell,

i couldn't tell

time passed

and on my throne

i sat,

on the edge of harmony and corruption.