Im tired of writing about love

Pretending I understand it

And all it’s complexity

As if I have any success stories

 

The truth is I am still just as oblivious

Just as dumbfounded by love

As I was as a child

When I was first learning the word

 

I won’t sit here and tell you what love is

I won’t write metaphors or similes for love

Instead I will write apologies

I will write apologies and epitaphs and all my lamented poems about brokenness

To remind myself that pain is only as bad as we let ourselves believe it is

And that love is the closest feeling to pain that I will ever know.

 

So I won’t write about love

It leaves tear marks on the pages

Dilutes the ink as they fall

Do not be fooled by the way they shine

 

And I’m tired of waiting for the rain

Turning my head at every mention of thunder

Every roar across the sky

Or flash of light on the horizon

It’s time I write my own story