13 Years

How is it that my heart is stuck between two places?

Dominican Republic,

The land I was born in

The land where my childhood was painted

With nothing but brightness and joy

The land where my family is found in

The land where my identity was made

But that I had to stray away from at age 6

Because turns out,

There was somewhere else

And better for me to be in

 

Philadelphia,

The place which I never felt whole in

But never truly felt lost in either

The place in which all my Dominican-ness

Was eradicated

The place where I adopted Philly slang
And where my Spanish accent soon ceased

Where I soon did not feel like a Dominican

But a Philly inbred

 

Philly has had my heart for 13 years,

But Dominican Republic,

You were my first love,

You were the first relationship that I had

But all I have now with you is a long-distance relationship

And I am so sorry for cheating with you with Philadelphia,

I am in love with both of you

But I am stuck between choosing which one of you

Will have all of me,

 

Dominican Republic,

You have such warmth and familiarity to you

That I enjoy

You have helped me preserve my identity

And Philly,

Has this diversity and openness to it 

Philly watched me grow

Helped me find my passions,

Created these beautiful changes for me,

And so I am selfish

For not being able to pick which one of you to be with,

 

But there is no such thing as being in love with two 

People at the same time

Or in this case,

I cannot be in love with both Philadelphia and Dominican Republic

So,

I am sorry to break your heart Philly

I know we’ve been together for 13 years 

Our relationship has been long-term

You’ve transformed me

Changed me,

I still love you 

But you are not for me

Because Dominican Republic is where 

Home and my heart is at,

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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