Drug Abuse

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Tell me of all the idiosyncrasies you developed as a result of your first trauma,and I will tell you of all the times God has let me down.Follow me down twisting alley-ways and one way roads,
You’ve sat down, and you watch me fumble with the guitar. My thoughts wander. I’m drunk.
I sit, watching him drink even though he’s wasted. Blotchy skin, red and damp, and the slick guitar strummed under slurring words.
Golden boy, Everything about you is a joke. But your punchline knocked me down. I nearly drowned in the light behind your eyes, I didn't fight it, let you in, You were never mine.  
Because I gave you my heart and soul,Isn't that how the song is suppose to go?The cycle of love was the rhythm to go with flow,Yet, the truth of you lies underneath the arteries of what was bitterer and untold. I quenched my fingers tightly to emb
Two
I struggled  I drank, I cut, I had no will to live  I over came but did the others?    One drinks He says one more He says he won’t drive 
Kids don't go to school anymore. We don't learn math. We don't learn English. Kids learn truth these days. Because kids don't go to school these days. We go to empty parking lots, innocent and free. 
Sometimes I wake up and wonder what keeps me motivated I keep my foot on the brake while some others accelerated I've elevated but still hated what I was saying I was just moving quickly still testing my own patience...
Do you feel alright?Have you had enough?I can't help but think aboutThe way I'm feeling stuck.I really wanna tryTo make you feel alright.Should I have another drink?I've had enough tonight.I know you wantTo feel a certain way.I wanna make you unde
Drip Drop Drip Drop Drip Drop Daddy’s nose is bleeding again I wonder why he always has so many nosebleeds?
1, 2, 3 All Eyes On Me: is what our teacher used to say, to keep the childrens eyes on her any time off the day, are adolescent minds are so easy to sway, so here we are and here we must stay.
There once was a man named Daedalus Known as a dentist of excellence He sampled some Vicodin Now he’s imprisoned in A habit of common excrescence   A habit which started with booze
I told you no. I was already in control. Smoked a little grass here and there, and when that pain came I didn't think it was something I couldnt bear.   I told you no.
Metal rings placed chains laced around my hands, legs, feet and waist. How many times will I let this happen? How many times can I let my family be disgraced?  
Too much fun as the night begun Didnʼt think too much of it but my mind was slightly unfit I danced some reminiscing, i feel dumb
Bees are like kamikazes and Superman probably ain’t gonna save the day today oh well let the strange hang today I’ve been feeling kinda different lately might just blow my brains away some will say oh dang that’s a crazy mang and some w
It wasn't until one day, A Thursday to be exact, That I opened my eyes slowly To the shimmering beams of light. Soaked deep beneath my skin, I welcomed the light. The glow emitted from within me
A broken soldier in the quiet night dying to take back the light head high in a losing fight  to hide from those who know   with each swing, a child died not just his, but the one inside
I was walking to the park The sign said it was closed after dark, I don't care The air was cool It could've been colder   I saw a man sitting on a bench Taking turns between his beer and cigarette
It was a sunny day The day I decided to die Grabbing fate by the wrist, telling her “no more. I’m done playing your rules” I smiled
I've traveled many lands To a find a mind like yours. I'm writing down new plans Once I reach new shores. Now i'm somewhere in the islands Underage mystery face in a bar.
Whose blessing like an aimless leaf I believe that juice is what makes me reckless I fall in love too quick A smile and i'm gooey with the knees You laugh at a joke I hardly speak and it's night I weep
Parted Lips a-POP-olypse The seats of the minivan burst into flame  as rabid fragments of monster carrots feed Death while he
She had me feeling dead I was in the floor with all this red I just wanted to be with you in my twin bed  I take these drugs cuz im misread Cuz thats all we know what to do instead
This is not a war story but one of victory. I can hear the freedom bells ring and my heart sings because once I was a captive now liberated by the King. But that’s just the thing I wasn’t always free.
Harder and harder my temperament fought Until it fell still in the night   Sadder and sadder my heart had become Relinquishing the fight
I wake up light-headed and I touch my pillow, trying to put my memory back together but I just don't know how the hell I got home last night. I remember standing on the side of the road, my legs barely putting up a fight.
What did I say? did I mean it that way?  I'm forgetting something  tell me please  before I start remembering The pain to me is numbing  and I didn't mind forgetting  but the memories are bringing back  the reasons for forgetting  even though I sa
These little things, they sell in magzines,they'll help not feel a thing.They'll make you laugh until you cry,they'll make you want to drop dead and die.These little white pills can help and they can kill.
Oh Darth Vader Pez dispenserLying empty on a deskNo more small candies to giveYou smile coyly up at meWishing to be refilledTo be useful yet againSadly I have none to give youBut you served me well
There is an elephant in my room no lie He is hanging on the ceiling I just look em in the eye and start screaming Then he says be silent before i get violent How the fuck you think i feel you don't see me smiling
Mother, please don’t go away. You know how I love you… I’m calling you, please answer me! Please don’t go please not now!   Do you hear me calling?
It has been fifteen years. Sometimes I wonder If when I cry you shed tears, too, and I wonder Will I go deaf soon? I try to drown out your shouting matches. The percussion leads your voice. The great wave crashes
I often struggle with words, which for me either come out wrong or don’t come out at all. In fear of the first happening, it's usually the second.  Here’s the result:   What I Never Got to Say
Dear Drugs, You're popular in my community Yet from you I have immunity Maybe it's just because of my brain For I know all you bring is pain Or maybe it's because I know
I am ancient hopes,  I am fragile dreams,  I am the stony, hardened tears of a soul with too many years, in a journal with degraded seams as a blind heart in darkness gropes  
I want to dream.    Purple skies, fireflies with lights like stars up in that lavender sky.  With too much light to disguise shadows and monsters and evil and You.  
Dear Beautiful: From then until now Your scars still show Your tears are dried and when people speak it hurts. Dear Beautiful: You think you are so unnatractive
Dear Alcohol,
Today in the car he told me how easy it is to kill yourself. I wrote it down thinking it would create some meaningful piece of poetry,
End
Dear Life, It's a burning mess, and I'm one of the flames; Terminally depressed because it's all the same. Another Saturday night and it's one a.m., You're back on my mind, I just need to win.
Rotten apple, Rotted teeth Sharps of glass, it's on me Glistened eyes, foaming mouth Hot flame, bat wool.   Cleanse the cloth- Pour the oil, orange and soiled. Pop the bubble, brush the skin.
Hey there old friend. Maybe friend isn’t the correct term, so allow me to rephrase. Hello old habit. You and me were best friends. We were the Thelma and Louise of our time and yes we flew over the cliff and plunged into the abyss.
You won’t even grow. You’ve always got tabs, You’re trying to sell but your funds are so low. You’re high when you’re in class, You might not even pass,
It all started when I was just a little girl, pills got you, and your life turned in a whirl. I always wondered why I wasn't worth more than a pill,
It all started when I was just a little girl, pills got you, and your life turned in a whirl. I always wondered why I wasn't worth more than a pill,
Because i love you, ill watch you struggle  ill watch you struggle for a better tomorrow with that needle in your arm and the coke in your nose Empty promises and hollow sorrows ill try to help you because i love you 
Trapped in his own asylum Letting fumes take hold of his lungs Booze takes over his brain Like a video control game. Midnight thoughts Rake at his mind Like jubilation Being exiled.
Once upon a time...   There was a young couple with too many kids: Poor Isaac, Miss Sue, and sadly, young Sid. The three of them had never enough to eat. Momma didn't know what to do or who to meet.
Once upon a time, in good health We see a young girl covered in filth Who wanted to go to a ball But she sadly met a wall   Noticed, this young girl was And with friends, she decided to get a buzz
They say life is a gift, That love bridges the rifts, They say 'follow your dreams', They ask you to come clean.   But what if life is greedy and shallow, Driven by heads and hearts that are hollow,
you told me, i’m a fighter, you told me, you’d always be here. you were your sister’s protector, and I’m my brother’s keeper, you suffered
Racing hearts, thoughts to match, knew it was bullshit, the high never lasts. A breath, a touch, makes you give in so fast. Pain brings you to a wall you simply cannot pass. I love you, I hate you. I don't even know you.
Oh dear sweet Alice, Pure heart of white roses. The queen is coming for you With all the king’s horses.   You seem ill Alice. Are you feeling alright? Didn't your mother ever warn you
  Hide Is all I can say Before the hollow thud of boots cross the floor I hold my younger brother to my chest
You had bourbon in your eyes and you knew I was thirsty I was Gods dilemma  and you loved a little controversy    Me, and you and powder blue  
My father once said to me, “If a rule seems stupid, Lourdes, it’s probably there Because some idiot did something stupid, and now you’re all Paying the price.” It couldn’t have been more than a year after that
1.     Community Member. 2.     Bottom Shelf, but lower than that. 3.     Secrets underneath the floorboards. 4.     Not a hero nor a heroine . 5.     Numb to headlines of “Ann Arbor Teen Dies…”
It is a scary thing to admit to yourself How you were sexually abused. Especially by one that you trusted. How he left me, in flames I combusted.  
I’ve never had stitches.Though my efforts to scratch my itching bones
31,536,000 seconds. The time I had to change. 86,400 seconds. The amount of time it took.  Days blurred together, Repetitive routine with no interruption.
Drugs cannot harm you Every drug needs a catalyst and that catalyst is you What were you thinking  when you were drinking Did you see the bottle as the enemy? Or yourself Every human can be a superhero
I stagger through the gate and my daughter comes running, “Daddy! Daddy!” she screams running into my waiting arms. I lift her, I throw her up in the air, I see her flying, I want to break her fall,
I am an emotive voice expressed through pen and paper, but once was uncapable of being heard  because six plus years of bully beat downs made fear seal every word.   
As a way to not feel depressed, Or maybe it was oppressed. The fifth grade was only a start, As a senior I still feel its mark.   My mother felt the bottle or aluminum can was an escape
There was a time when only two things kept me afloat.Music, and Poetry.When daddy was downing shots and doing drugs,And the lawyers wouldn't believe mom.When daddy's new wife beat my little sister with a brush,
I'm sure we've all heard the tale of the girl named Alice The one who fell down the rabbit hole, and was chased from the Card Palace Who spoke with flowers, and attended the Mad Tea Party
I never realized how much I was missing out on life Never realized I was still in the night You found me smoking a cigarette and you reached out your hand Why me?
My wrist, formless, shifting and breaking like a cloud;You grab hold, tightly--too tightly,And I vaporize before your eyes.  
There is a golden seed, In the middle of a dark alley With shattered glass and a trail of  Condoms, pinned down by needles of  Heroin addicts and junkies. Its golden aura descends on the 
Smoke fills my nose.The sweet scent tempting, calling me closer. But no! Stay away, your mom and your dad are finally proud of you."We're glad you didn't end up like your brother."
You're my best friend But no one can ever know It's not that I'm embarrassed of you No of course not It's that everyone would be disappointed if they knew   I remember
Between my fingertips I hold the key to self destructionWith no instruction but to inhaleDeep and fast to make the head rush last and with destruction in handLooking around I suddenly noticed something
you down bottles like you're going to find something special  don’t act like you love her  because if you did you’d be kissing her and not cigarette butts you lied to everyone about being sick
  I’m honestly stupid about shit been close to incarcerated my arm been lacerated on morphine for the stupidest reason And promised I wouldn’t do it ever
I woke up every single day sure that I was dead; I couldn't seem to silence all the noise within my head.Reaching for my phone though I could barely use my eyes; my life was so consumed with the chase of getting’ high.Dropping to the ground, agony
You told me I made you feel the way I feel when I draw circles under my tongue,                                     but I'm not very good with new concepts.Driving the nails into the coffin of my inhibitions,
Three years later, I wasn’t prepared. I looked at the driveway, and headed for the stairs. The cement was cracked. The grass was to my knees.
I’m addicted to a person Who’s addicted to a drug That played a mean trick and no longer makes him numb. “I’ll be right back,” he says. I look at him and nod
Come home my sister, Come home my brother; Let these dark days be over, And light shine upon the pathway That carries you on its back, To the warming house you know.   A cloaked figure shadows,
She picks up the lighter, And he hands her the leaf. Her body is on fire. She is so ready to leave. Her tears melt away, When she hits the herb. But the pain stays the same,
So here is a story about how I became oblivious to addiction with a substance I've been told was something God had gifted and a gift it was for a while at least no sense of pain and time's existance just ceased
To question who I am and what I've been through
I cover it all up as though it doesn’t exist. I pray that the world doesn’t find out. I pray that my family knows nothing. I suffer in silence as I pray my husband comes home at night. It is just another day in the life of an addict’s wife.
The group of people sitting close by at my lunch table stare as I close the small zip loc bag titled, "Monday" and ask me what those pills are for.
 I remember altogether underneath the weather, hopes, dreams shining like sun beams.  you know what it means I don’t and it seems So filled with passion and the will for action we thought for sure that you would have some traction.
In my old best friend's bedroom drunk and stoned out of my head I keep lighting myself on fire again and again in her bed. Every time, it burns and every time, I scream but once it's out, I light it again
The darkness surrounds me The light grows faint I'm falling endlessly Engulfed in pain I can feel the cooling touch The air whisps by Falling into this abyss I soon become blind
Dependency Conflicted What should've been restricted Honeysuckle violet roses Come to me When I'm at my lowest  Opiate sinsemilla Desolate feelings are too familiar Waft Inhale
Dreams that compose an ever-so-distant me Wrap around in a cloak of contingency  Mirrored walls guard my heart Deflecting and rejecting all chances of happy
A fathers damaged heart A son who threw the dart A mothers tear of fear A drug thats all to real A brothers loss of trust A family built on rust Its crumbling in decay
Being drug-free is uplifting. Being drug-free has impacted me. Now I have my life back and strive not to lose it again; Too bad along the way I lost many a friend. I am no longer dependent. I am free.
An insatiable appetite. The gluttony stains your lips. Each day, each second, unwavering, yearning for more. Your cries are often heard, always heard, but does mine reach you?
Inhaling is the easy part. As these stained fingers crawl towards my gasping lips, there is an irrefutable shaking. My sour tongue has never felt an evil so calming.
“The youth of America is putting itself into a coma state.” We are all looking for numbness; finding our relief in painkillers. We are constantly looking for things to help us become paralyzed. We wish to become machines.
Daddy daddy A little girls hero Her very first crush Been with her since zero He'd rock her to sleep And tickle her till she woke But her daddy, he left her Recovering from coke
Look at me, the real me the one on the inside, i see the way you look at me when I say "NO!" your ready to leave, why? Is it because my eyes are glossed over and I'm as high as a kite,
The girl and the woman 
Let me tell the tale of a frail child,
I hit you, You hit me harder. Down in the gutter, No room to barter. A pack of smokes, That's fifteen years, Fifteen years less That I don't have to See your face or
It was always the rush that was the best part: That feeling of surreal realities as they brushed past my consciouness, tempting me further into a smoke-filled oblivion. I never wanted to leave.
My heart is a racehorse I'm terrified yet whipping it faster. Sights sharper than cut glass tastes like a penny on my tounge hands cold and clammy, but body burning and bleach clawing at my nose,
Usually a book is read page by page and the words just fly by. We could go back and re-read your whole story. Just set aside some time. But there's no time left to review. What could I have said to save you?
"Drug abuse"- that makes me abusive. So why do I feel like I'm the one who's been beaten? Not the beaten that leaves bloodied lips and brown bruises But the beaten that leaves you in last place in a contest
He walks with    his leather jacket slumped over     his shoulders          and his violet backpack          swinging violently          from   his shoulders. His mouth is   a motor,
Everyday I wake up in constant pain. Not physical. But it might as well be. Cause I'm hurting. Deep down, I feel like giving up. On people. Family. Myself. Life.
Her fingers are feathers, Lithe and delicate As they hover over the brushstrokes of Monet, Drawn to pigment like a moth to the flame.   His eyes are the ravenous mouths of predators
Life is precious, fragile, and an amazing experience. Memories last forever. The good, the bad, every important memory, can never be forgotten   Rolling around outside,
The nosebleeds of white, The sickness of brown, The sensation of Mr. E. All of these and none of these, Are ever what they seem. Sleepless nights with snow white, Eternal vomiting from a night of brown,
They bring us so low those seeds we have sown Nothing left to show Nothing can be grown
There lies a pain in me a pain like no other An urge more than a pain It started as nothing but a way to relax Relax a stressed out person Then it became fun Now the fun is gone and still present
Dear Adam,   Hearing the horrifying news It was impossible to contain my tears. Why would someone like you choose Such a permanent end to temporary fears?   But we know what made up your mind
To a friend I never knew,Your eyes deep and full of wonder.Brilliant cascades of royal blue.A smile so bright it brings envy to the sky.The sun and the moon couldn't rival your cherry lips in bloom.
You've walked this side before, And I've seen your time wary face. Seasons made you older, lines are drawn That cannot be erased.
What am I to you? Don't I cry and hurt like you? Don't I feel like you? Aren't I someone who aspires?   Or   Am I just what you own? Am I what you disregard?
Mom
She lays on her bed waiting for mom to return as she called her mom she laid down her head no answer, her heart burned things were missing, depression occurs how could mom take what wasn't hers
Please didn't know, You were sick but it didn't show, I screamed, I cursed but really I was just hurt please come back I miss you I'm sorry for what I did Please just don't disappear
Run.Run. How Far… How far till it’s there Until the destination is reached Run. Run. Heart beat in your ears Endorphins drown your brain Body feels weightless Run. Run. The soles of your feet
Pass me that instigating pest please Yes, that bag you are holding Pass it here im looking for a key to unlock my stress stuffed deep in mind Hold on, is that the one that makes my eyes bleed
The bottle hits her lips And her world tips She stops shaking She stops aching And she feels okay
"Just hanging out with a friend, Honey” he said, with his back turned to us as he spoke lovingly to his wife who sat miles away, on that set of islands we call our Motherland, on the other end of the phone line.
What is love? Love is the way, that he got me high, and layed me down to breathe together. Love is the way that he yelled, he screamed, he tore holes in walls and psyches.
Jane Doe does as Jane Does do. I can’t comprehend what it’s like to feel to not fit in. I am a missing piece to someone’s puzzle, a part of a matching set. I am an ill behaved gypsy in the body of a sovereign.
My body becomes weak My vison had turned blurry I hear the paramedics screaming We are losing her, Hurry! I am starting to feel sleepy But they refused to let me sleep ¨You have to keep your eyes open
Plush, Red, Pulse Thick, Smooth, Blood Bouncing To the constant beat Pulse Pound Pulse Somewhat sterile swords stab Through your gates Injecting foreign troops
You popped those red devils every night until the moonlight shines on you. Your daughter looked up to see you, with eyes full of tears while drinking a bottle of hatred.
If I ever see him again id ask why he wasn’t dead yet For a man so committed, he should have lied to rest Just like how she passed, how he made her fall victim The way he touched her small hand and tainted the skin
Go smoke Go drink Don’t choke Don’t think. Take pills Get high It kills Go fly. Do all Get drunk Don’t fall Don’t flunk. Go on Go out No con
No one knows No one cares Falling down All the stairs. The ones going up The ones going down Going ‘round and ‘round. When will it stop? Rushing, panting,
Im not the one For which they send I’m the one Who caused all good to end. I’m not from heaven Nor from hell I’ll wrap you up In my evil spell. Ill do you good Then go away
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