changing

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Every day you tell me I'm worthless. Every day you make me focus on you. Can you not sense this sadness? A sadness that is new.   Every day you try to change me. Every day you ask for money.
Hatred Anger "I'm giving up."  Reflection. Expansion. "I'll be better." 
Roaring to life as the lights go on, never stopping and always there. The noise distracting, the noise killing. On and on the noise went, never dying. Trying to change something it can't,
January – Just establishing new year resolutions, just dreaming about who I want to be, just looking back over the past year The Beginning.
I was in the school library at lunchtime Looking at a book entitled ‘When A Friend Dies’. I felt guilty, because I wasn’t grieving at all I just felt really sad.  
"Your smile was      fading                               Changing                              Rearranging  Its not the same As it used to be Cause you don't feel free I can hear your screams
I am a river working hard always moving changing everything around me, while accepting change, myself. Sometimes I am calm sometimes I am restless. No matter, for I am a river.
I was born in January, many don't remember because often my birthday falls on the same day as civil rights day, and the oppression of rights is much more important
If I ever go missing before we ever meet,  Instead of telling you where I’m hiding, 
In life there are many decisions All of which you have a choice in Right now I face two decisions Let him go or pull him in closer Convert my religion in hopes of being with him
I see a lot of women do this:   They make their way down A flight of stairs,
  With each passing second I am never the same person I was moments before.
Four trees grew in a clearing A weeping willow An oak A dogwood And a sapling. A stranger planted the sapling
I am a jagged egde of wonder.  Curious. Open. Receiving.  Tangled within my hair are questions and tasks and opportunities and projects and ability.  Build me patience. 
I used to be so angry It kept me going  It was my fuel Keeping the train that is myself moving
Oh Geez, this breeze, this wind in my soul isn't easy. The reason for this change of season is beyond my grasp, just beyond the looking glass.   At times I am estatic, fantastic but delayed,
I remember how I used to be; all the same, I remember who I used to want to be.
What made you change ?I changed for me, I changed completely.its hard to see.I have tattoos, so Im considered badI sometimes wonder, what if i had a dad?
Studio Lights
I am the strange man. The man that is a boy. The boy that is a man. I play words as a decoy, I refuse to write and wrong with the same hands. So I try to write as well as I can.
     Jr.High. Through the halls, head held high, making fun of kids of many types. Just for fun? Just for kicks? I couldn't really tell you why.   The laughs I got, for rude comments I made,
No. Rather difficult to define. So many infliction possibilities:Said with sorrow, pain, or glee. This little word however can make or break a person; Define who they are. 
Four years ago I saw a girl I didn't think she was very pretty Her face wasn't too bad She had sparkly eyes with long eyelashes Almost pretty
  What is freshmen orientation? How come it is so early? I do not feel like going to it, But somehow, I have to go.  
The world is changing at the speed of light, The fighters love and the lovers fight. The meaning of love is no longer known, But the hate within us is no longer shown. The world is better, but is also worse, 
Are we waiting on a change? Or are we waiting on the day, When men will stand up and take their place. In families, Hurting, Crying, Searching for direction. Mothers do all the work,
"You're almost done."That's what they say,A loaded gun pointed my way.Now its time for work, not play.
Why is it things can never stay the same?Everything constantly changing,I need a timeout in this gameBefore I yell out, screaming, raging.When things finally seem like they're going as planned;
How do you change a color of a rose?   When its color is already deep red.   Do you paint over its radiant shade?   Hoping that will stay when the right things are said.  
A dandelion gone to seed is an fascinating weed. It changes over time. Almost like a human of its on kind.
Heart thrumming Blood pulsing Mind racing Thoughts raging Demons pounding At my door Becoming one of them Once more.
I know what I should do, I know without a doubt I don't know where I learned it, or when I found it out. But, how in the world can I do what I should When only half of me wants to be good?
We break everyday Every day,we make mistakes Ask for forgiveness Or hide the mistakes away. But hide them away, And what do we gain? You lose. But be better, We are not old dogs
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