You Don't Know...

My disaster,

 

You don’t know, how much it hurts,

To hate myself.

 

I cry

Everytime I look in the mirror…

 

I imagine the world better off without me.

I cry myself to sleep at night.

The pain in my chest is threatening and my anxiety is built up, yet

You do nothing.

 

I’m screaming for help, but

You just don't get it.

You cannot see how I am hurt,

How, I cannot survive without love.

 

Mean words, harsh tones,

You bully and belittle me.

But for some reason,

I still love you.

 

I can no longer fight the inner demons

That I have fought far too long.

 

I am slowly drowning.

My lungs are filling with water, and

I can no longer scream for help…

 

The water, once warm and welcoming

Now surrounds me with power and authority.

It engulfs every particle of the being I am.

It is taking over and I have no control.

Won’t you save me?

 

I’m helpless. Worried. Fearful.

Constantly gasping for air

But not reaching the surface.

You wouldn’t know what that’s like…

 

You wouldn’t know what it’s like to be me.

I’m a stressed, depressed, insecure mess.

You have the power to help or to hurt,

And you have chosen the destructive path.

 

So have I.

 

Love,

Your Tragedy

 

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