Where do i belong?
I live in a house, not a home
with people who are my family, but not there for me
my only love is keeping my ties to this endless carousel of agony
keeping my chest from growing a hole that can swallow my heart
keeping me from sinking below the bathtub waters and never returning
he ties me to him with jewelery and weekends together
i love it, but how do i keep going when i am useless to him
if we get a place together,how can i help him?
i stress over so many things at once that i panic
i collapse on the floor, gasping, reaching out to be held
im alone cause he is not there for me
my family is, but im at fault
"you're making yourself like this!"
"do you want to go to a padded cell?"
"stop throwing a tantrum"
im reaching out to you, wanting to hold you
and all you do is give me a paper bag and send me to my room
alone, i comteplate death and the silence i would get,
but i remember him, text him, wait for him
he comes later and holds me tighly, he understand
of course he would, hes been through the same
hes my love, they are my stressors
how different would things be if he lived with me?