The State of Certain Things

Fri, 11/28/2014 - 22:53 -- Leyoht

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Lock me away to the place we once knew
The place we both dwelled when I still loved you—
The place where my face hid behind the curtain—
Curtain of shame; hiding the truth.

 

Know it was I who had built you straight up.
At first you thought I would move nowhere but up;
At first you believed my demons and flaws false.
Until you parted with what I’d brought up.

 

What if I told you who I really hate?
Who I really loved would appreciate
Who I am inside—and all through and through?
Would you leave or would you just faint?

 

I hate many people, but I turn the cheek,
That’s why I’ve never anyone peek.
That’s why I’ve kept to myself all along
And made my identity a path to seek.

 

Some days in life, I had thought demons fake,
Some creatures who could not ever awake,
Some monsters told in storybook tales.
Now they go sneer at my every mistake.

 

I may be innocent, but not perfect.
Behind this curtain, all my flaws you’ll detect.
Behind this curtain you will hear me cry:
“See as angels and demons intersect!”

 

But you’ve just looked!

 

Fine; I know how it is. I really do.
You’ve seen me once; you’ve seen through and through!
You’ve seen only one slice of life I can share.
But that is enough; I know this is true.

 

And you all wonder why I hide my true self,
Why I insist to leave life on the shelf.
Why I hide it all in a faraway place.
He who hides hates his own self.

 

And you do, too.

 

You’re so close-minded—like all of those rats.
No wonder you view me as a hungry cat.
No wonder I’d lived in such eternal fear.
Is this what you wanted? Did you want that?

 

I’ve shown you my face; now where is my mask?
Where is the face I’ve worn for every task?
Where is the shield I use to protect myself?
What unnecessary questions need you ask?

 

My anger turns me to a predator:
A creature that feeds off those without heart-sores,
A creature that preys on the little, plump mice.
With no consideration to anything more.

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