peace of mind
bruised up
barely breathing
gasping for air
body shook
hands antsy
trying
dying
to grab the light you took.
i dont know how it got like this
being a little girl is what i miss
its easier to be happy when you're oblivious.
it all changed
before i was even tena
a healthy minded girl gone astray and corrupt
guess that shit happens when you grow up
walking lifelessly in the halls of hell.
fidgety.
distraction.
calm.
focus.
fidgety.
distraction.
familiar faces calling my name.
if only they could get inside my head
they'd know that
im always trying
to convince myself im fine.
when i relapsed last night
on the floor crying
wishing i could see the light
guess ive gottent good at lying.
bright
mindful
sunny
hazy
tired eyes
summer.
everything isnt so brutal
atleast the weather isnt anymore
which was the last time since the razor kissed my skin.
i lie awake for hours, wishing for human contact
waiting for a friend.
even my mother is a stranger.
feels like she dont know my name.
theres many types of loneliness
but it all hurts the same.
the sun is too bright
and im still dying to grab the light you took.