My last swimming oasis ..

How should I describe my soul, when I don't know if I have one? How should I say what pain feels like, when I don't know if I have feelings? How should I explain it to you what is left from me?

What I could say is that every soul is like the ocean; sometimes it's stormy, aggressive and cold. Some other time it's sunny, quiet and warm. The beautifully thing about the ocean are the islands, which are like good memories in the sea. Good memories that always swim on top, the things you like to see and remember, what makes you glow and opens your heart.

But the other side is the deep ocean, under water…..the darkness that a surrounds you. The cold heart that would never let you see the lovely side. This dark place you have to hide, because of your ugly life.

No one wants to see the dark side of his soul; it's easier to live in the sun where the happy faces are looking for you.

I have left this place a long time ago. No, I have sunk in mourning, despair, and the negative that had moved me. The darkness kept me sleeping……..

But there a sunbeam from above! What was it? What did it want? Whispers that comes from above, does someone miss me? I try to swim up there, but I'm not strong enough. Let me here one more time a laugh, let me here what the wind would say, let me see the sun a last time! Because it could be my last swimming oasis.