Modesty

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Modesty...
What exactly is it?
Is it covering yourself up like a nun?
No!
It is being confident
It is being strong
It is being SEXY!
It is showing the world
That you are beautiful
It is putting on your best dress
Standing in the mirror
Twirling around in circles
And saying "Damn I look good!"
But then you are met by a chorus of evil words
Slut
Conceited
Bitch
Do you think of anyone but yourself?
Why is this?
If we think we look good we are called names
We are met with the same
If we find ourselves ugly
Pathetic
Annoying
Attention whore
Stop complaining!
We can't love ourselves
But we also can't complain
We must stay quiet
Hush, hush, hush
Silence our bodies
And numb the heart
Teach our backs to take each bite of the whip as a blessing
Each lash cutting deeper and deeper
Until our bones become raw and exposed
Until we no longer feel pain
We are stone
We do not cry
We never scream
Because we've stitched together our lips
In fear of saying something offensive
Because even though we stuff our ears with cotton
To soften the blow of the sticks
That beat on our eardrums
We still can't handle it
We shrink into dark corners
Placing our heads between our knees
Telling ourselves
Breathe, breathe, breathe!
But our lungs have been replaced with gills
Like a fish out of water
We flop around until we are still
Like statues
Cold, hard, dead
But what kind of life is that?
What kind of life is it to be shoved into that box
That box of conformity
That box telling you to love yourself but not too much
Because then your suddenly better than others
Your head is held just a little bit higher
You stride just a little bit longer
Our voices are just a little bit louder
Than those that try to bring us down
But that's the way it should be
Do not confuse confidence with arrogance
Do not confuse happiness with pride
Do not rob me of the right to love myself
No matter if my stomach make a good pillow to rest your weary head on
Or my thighs touch in the middle
And if the opposite is true still let me love myself
Because that is all you have
I don't mean your body
Because when our times come
That is broken too
I am talking about your mind
Your heart
Your eyes and how they twinkle when in love
Your smile and how it spreads happiness to everyone you see
This is true modesty
Total abandon
Some people call it reckless
Foolish
Careless
But I call it beautiful
Brave
Strong
Confident
Being honest with yourself while shutting out the lies
It what real modesty is all about!

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