If Our Bodies Held

I drink a bottle
Make that two
Trying to remember my first time with you

And then it goes black
Just everything
I don't want to go back
For anything

Then bam
A flash
A light before my eyes

Then bam
A crash
Another part of me dies

My horrors I witness outside my body
The scandals, the lies, the broken ties
All seen outside my body

I'm terrified, was this the man I was?
A rebel whose heart belonged to no one, not even his own because

It was hate, an anger deep inside
It was sorrow that burrowed and stayed alive
It was the past that gave him hope for the future
It was the loneliness that made it look like never

And here he was, stuck in his own enjoyment
A euphoria of eloquent design
A sadist out of employment
"If only she could be mine"

What would he accomplish then?
If he were ever to achieve that goal of his
He thought and stared into his own eyes
"What love does this man have to give?"

He saw himself incapable, irrational, angry over pathetic things
He realized that this was a phase of life that tangled mankind with suffocating strings

And the man was disgusted, shivers ran down his spine
"How could man ever love man if my heart isn't even mine?"

He cared about everyone, the same as tolerance and empathy
Love was never his from the start
What drives this madness he does not know, for reality,
Was man who could never love himself, thus torn apart

Love became a myth, a fantasy to avoid the inevitable heartbreak
Love became a game of chance with no fair play except guaranteed heartache

The man could not understand it, he looks through his life with scrutiny
Never has he been with one for so long that even he had self-pity

What were his chances, to be saved by someone else
"For love to give is love to sacrifice - it's either heaven or hell"

One after one he is torn apart by love
Every person he cared apart turns away, in spite of
His sincerest pleas, his unfathomable cries
He throws up once more with bottle in hand until he almost dies

Drunk on his obsession of love, he quits
He re-enters his body and accepts his fate
God there or not, he raises a toast in the air
"For the love that never was, for the love that was only hate"

He was alone now, once again

Then bam
A flash
A light before his eyes

Then bam
A crash
He's tired of the lies

I throw my bottle, he throws his
It crashes, splashes, and mashes
What love was truly his?

I'm finished, this man is sick of it
A veteran of hurt whose heart was open to everyone
Now it's a gift

It was arrogance that shrouded his mentality
It was reckless love that gave way to apathy
It was innocence that drove his past through hell
It's the now that matters, it was then he fell

And there I was, surrounded by folk I cared for
A feeling of pure delight
Now there's only one more door
"Love is for everyone, for it I'm willing to fight"

What was next for him?
When he walked through that door
I turned the knob and stopped and looked back
"What an adventure, wonder what is next for store"

I took a step
Make that two
Then I jumped, he jumped, and we flew

Out there in the open
With anything
I'm moving forward inch by inch
For everything

And only if our bodies held
Can we let go
Our spirits can fly wherever
Let's enjoy the show

This poem is about: 
Me
My community
Our world
Poetry Terms Demonstrated: 

Comments

mister4music

This year has been the tougest year of my life

Like everyone else, I'm continuing with more than a fight

I'm waging a war with my ancestors, running crusades against my past

It is a bloody journey filled with rage, hate, and wrath

But in all, we cannot forget where we came from and how we learned

We cannot forget how to love, how to care, and how to serve

I wish you all best luck on your journeys out there, your dangerous trecks and paths

We can fight the good fight together, because life will not always last

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