Helpless and weary, I try to stand strong

this conflict I have fough, far too long.

Every night when I lay in bed,

the day's tragedies dance in my head.

Every morning, I wake in a daze-

back to this sameold life long maze.

Trapped alone, destined to repeat

the same mistakes that have become my defeat.

They say the body is a sacrad place,

but the addiction to pain I can hardly face.

I pace the floor all day long,

pondering all that I've done wrong.

It's hard to believe what I've done,

but the past is gone, the future to come

With numbness of feelings I try to stand tall,

but I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all.

This feeling of nothing makes life a drag,

I'm nothing more than a listless rag.

I want to fix this, I need to fix it now.

I'm trying - really trying - I just don't know how.

Should I do what they say and make life go their way?

Or await another day that could end in dismay?

I'm hoping things will get better, just like the weather,

but for now I'll just start with getting it together.