"Daddy"

Thu, 11/16/2017 - 13:56 -- Amiyah

Dear Daddy,

Did you ever really love, care, believe in me being your child.
You know it kills me inside every time I blink there are your eyes the skin complexion all I have is yours.
But where were you when I screamed, cried, and pleaded for you.
Those days I could've died and needed you.
Those days the pain took a toll and we would struggle to pay any and everything.
The days we were struggling to eat but you were out living lavishly in the streets.
Because "I'm not your child" right or was that just said out of smight.
Did you hate me, never want me to be born because it would ruin your "perfect life"
because it would kill your reputation, your family, or the most important thing your money, and another family.
Because being there and being there and being the one that was supposed to care for me in life is the one saying "forget that she's alive" would you care if I had died.
Because "Daddy" if that's what you want me to call you but a "daddy" or even a "father"
Should be there and provide for their child
You should wanna lay down and die for your child but all your really did was lie and deprive your child of the love and care she needed m
But Craig or is that disrespectful but you have no right to feel disrespected because you are the king yeah that right
The king of disrespect
The king of hurt
The king of neglect
The king of not caring
The king of hypocrisy
But I won't let another tear roll down my cheek at the sound of your name or when they talk about fathers
If you're still wondering moms fine since that's the only thing you cared about right having control and power over her.
Isn't that the only reason you talked to me to have an excuse to get back in contact with her
I'm dying slowly, but you wouldn't care because my life doesn't matter to you
How about the times when I contemplated suicide
Or hey what about the molestation
But that will never really matter to you because you wouldn't give a Shit
If I was frankly dead right because I'm not your responsibility or your child so why should my little life matter to you right
You are the reason for my walls I have up of the pain in my life but no "Daddy" has more important things to do in his life than to care for his oldest child
Do you care for your new children
You probably do because you love them more than me
But if I ever do make it in life which I doubt I will
Don't try to come back when things are going good so you can have a cut

This poem is about: 
My family
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