what we have

is a cautious love

as though one misstep could make me fall

but i've already fallen for you

 

you take my hand

and my breath catches

like a snag on a sweater

and you pull back, untangle me

and all is right again

 

when i see you across the way

and, as if you knew i'd be there,

you turn, wave, and so do the butterflies in my stomach

that have been there for what feels like forever

and i hope won't go away

 

you said, "don't treat me like i'm fragile"

and i choked on the way i wanted to tell you

that it's not you that's fragile

we're fragile like porcelain already cracked,

the glue to fix us still wet

 

when you kiss me,

it's a reassurance

that yes, you're here, you love me too

and when i kiss you,

it's a reminder

that yes, we're here, know that i love you

 

you know i'm scared

for the future

and what it could bring me

of the future

and what it could bring us

so i try to breathe you in today

fill my lungs with our love

and exhale slowly, oh so slowly

so you'll stay

 

when i go to touch you

or you go to touch me

and i draw back, hesitate

it's not that i don't want to

i know how to let you go

but it's broken my heart already

so if i don't hold your hand now

i won't have to let you go again

 

you seem to bear the weight of the world

as if it were nothing

you acknowledge it, let it go

the way i wish i could

because i bear the weight of the world with less grace than atlas

and your smile makes me numb, the weight less of a burden

so i feel like i can let it slip off my broken shoulders,

come tumbling down, free

 

and what we have

is a cautious love

but god, you make me want to be reckless