Backpack Full of Insicurity

Pretty

Skinny

Perfect

words that society chooses for us

 

You say

I run like a girl,

scream like a girl,

throw like a girl.

From the time life was more innocent to now

You've used these phrases

To build your gender

up

And push mine down.

 

Always wondering

Why can't

I

Her

we

be treated the same way as

you?

To have the same freedom to be passed to in PE

To have the same freedom to dress how we please

And not have to worry about what the repercussions may be.

To have the same freedom to not have to feel

insecure about our bodies.

 

I'm asking you

Are we just supposed to

Sit on the sidelines and

Cheer you on at football games?

Do you expect us to

Stand around and

And choose whether or not to wear makeup based on if you like it

or not?

We don't care what you think.

And even if a small part of you

presumes that

We are

the weaker sex

Then you should know that

We are

not.

 

We are strong

We are brave

We are intelligent

And we are equal

 

When life was more innocent

I ignored the degrading words you shot at me

So I played my game

Like a girl

My curls sprung up and down

My orange pearl kept the beat

My feet struck the floor

And left black marks

On the back of your heart

Teaching myself to finally be free

 

To pass the ball from my hands to yours.

 

But I'm not done yet.

Because I want

you to know

What dress codes are teaching

you.

 

That you are allowed to be distracted by our choice of

clothing and attracted to how much of our skin it shows.

 

Dude, control yourself

Everyone has skin.

 

These codes are teaching

You that you are allowed to

act as animal roaming free from a cage

while I feel caged in my own skin.

 

I'm sorry

If my body distracts

your actions

 

In class

If my shorts are too short

Or my bra strap is showing

You should be sorry

    

But I don't care what you say

I'm just going to keep going     

 

Thoughtful

Kind

Hard-working

Words that I choose for me

 

When life was more innocent

counting 1, 2, 3  

were just numbers

now, it rates

my body,

My Hair

My makeup,

Me.

4, 5, 6

Things we cannot

Will not

Never will fix

7, 8, 9

My body will always be mine

 

These ratings should be forgo-10

 

In my eyes.

It's not a surprise that you continue to

Rate

Evaluate

And judge us

From 1-10

Teaching us to dress for you

And not for success.

 

“Boys gave me a 6 and gave her a 10”

Forcing me to walk behind the footsteps of trends,

Creating boundaries for what I post on instagram

Deleting the memories because of my insecurity  

You are asserted because I am introverted

 

I feel abandoned

Not accepted

Not tolerated

just Affected

You never advocated

You just advertised

Me

Across the inter-net

 

And I'm tired of not expressing myself because of what other people think of me.

I'm afraid someone is going to think I'm trying to be someone I'm not

even though

this is who I am.

I'm fearful people might think I'm trying too hard.

But I'm sick of being scared of what other people think of me.

 

There is no violence

But there shouldn't be such a

silence

Noiseless

Nothing

 

Pretty

Skinny

Perfect

Words that shouldn't define who you are

 

Thoughtful

kind

Hardworking

Words that are more meaningful to me.

 

This poem is about: 
Me
My community

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